What is Authoritarian Parenting?

web site analytic

Why this picture to illustrate Authoritarian Parenting? Well, I think it fits the theme perfectly. Read on and judge by yourself.

This style is characterized by high parental expectations that the child conforms and complies to the parents' rules and directions.

These parents always try to have total control on their children. They have strict rules, which are usually enforced without much affection. The methods are usually to try to get the children to obey, without providing them with any choices, explanations or options. They have strict standards of behavior and are most of the time very critical of their children when they do not meet these standards.

Typically, these parents will not explain why they want their children to do a particular thing. If questioned on the reason, their most likely answer would be something like "Because I'm telling you to!".

They will punish bad behavior but not reward good behavior. All their focus seems to be on bad behavior. They are very likely to choose hitting a child as a form of punishment rather than grounding him for instance.

Starting to see the link with the picture? ;) This parenting style is also referred to as military parenting style.

As a result, most children raised by authoritarian parents don't learn to think for themselves as they are not expected to understand why a certain behavior is expected. They usually lack social skills because their parents always predict what they should do; they don't get to make decisions. They will not easily take initiatives. They also usually lack curiosity and spontaneity.

Then, there is the minority of children who don't go along with the authoritarian parenting style and who rebel by reacting to the constant control exerted by their parents.

Recent research has shown some of the possible outcomes for children growing up with this parenting style:

  • They are more likely to become followers of individuals who DO NOT have their best interest at heart. Why? Because their parents send the message that they cannot think by themselves when they make all the decisions and give orders. They will be more sensible to peer pressure and more likely to have drugs or alcohol problems. They do not realize that they can make good decisions on their own and stand up for themselves

  • As a consequence, their self-esteem is low and they are more likely to become defiant and aggressive

  • As discussed previously, they tend to lack social skills

  • They are more likely to be depressed

    As a conclusion, I'm sure that you'll agree with me that it's NOT the most desirable parenting style. The best parenting style in terms of outcome has been shown to be Authoritative Parenting (yes, the two words are close and it can be confusing!). And, the style that could be considered its opposite is Permissive Parenting.

    Click here to go from Authoritarian Parenting to Parenting Styles

    Click here to go from Authoritarian Parenting to
    www.parenting-boys.com's home page